He said “I wouldn’t pull out.” A man I do not know saw images of me and let “I wouldn’t pull out” slip off his fingertips. I wanted to vomit. I felt dirty. I felt like a napkin someone used to wipe chicken grease off of their mouth with. But we ARE just towelettes, right? We’re just here for men to soil. Now matter how hard I try to be seen as a human being I will always have to write things like this. As long as I continue to exist in this body I will have to argue against the notion that it is acceptable for a man to physically or verbally force himself on me. “I wouldn’t pull out” is not a compliment, nor is it attractive. It’s an incredibly trauma inducing statement carrying graphic imagery on its shoulders. It is a statement that fuels the Jezebel archetype; it makes the assumption that I am sexually available to any man so long as I am breathing. It is a statement that fuels rape culture, denying the right to consensual, emotional and protected sex. “I wouldn’t pull out” does not mean “I think you are a beautiful person.” It means “I am aroused by you and anticipate bringing myself to the point of ejaculation with no regard to your health or life plans.” Men need to understand that. Women need to understand that too. This kind of speech is not okay and it is not something you have to accept. You are not a toy existing only for thrills. You’re not a damn napkin.
She just got up and spoke nothing but truth and hopefully deliverance to many women who have been on the other side of such comments.
This is so relevant to me and the things that men write under images of me all the time. It almost makes me want to never post images of myself again, but if I did that, that would giving those men power over me and how I view myself and I refuse.
A man recently said this to my face. “You’re so fine I wouldn’t even pull out”… disgusting.